Are you postponing your happiness?

Thursday, April 25

I've been thinking about this a lot this week.

I think that so many of us envisage a time in a 'few years time', when we will be truly happy.

And I think that is a trap that loads of South Africans living in London especially, fall into. 

Many of us living here, and I am certainly one of them, dream and plan for the day when we are going to move back to the sunnier land. Now as an aside, I do believe that many of us have forgotten just how cold South Africa can get.   We all tend to go 'home' in December or April for holidays and as this falls in Winter in the UK and Summer in SA, I for one, imagine it being permanently warm there.  The last full winter I did in SA was in 2006...and I have long forgotten the freezing cold nights with no central heating.  Seriously, it snows every winter on my Parents farm, it gets proper cold there.  

But lets be honest, I would take light cold weather over dark cold weather any day.

Back to the real topic now.

I think that so many of us, have these dreams and plans for when we get back to South Africa, about how we will be guaranteed to be happy.  Because, well it will be warm, obviously.
And we will have that dream job that has seemed to allude us in the UK.  Or even better, our own business.
We will also have massive house, swimming pool, and a Family of course.

But unrealistic dreams is not what I want to highlight here either.

It's the postponement of happiness that I think we are costing ourselves on.  We tend to live in a bit of limbo here after a while.  After we have got over the initial excitement of staying in a crummy hostel in a major city in Europe every other weekend, we then settle in a life of domesticity in London, whilst we pass away the time before we move back to SA, after hopefully gaining the coveted red passport.

I think that we all regularly need to look at our lives and where we are in terms of:

Working in a job that we love.

Being in a healthy happy relationship.

Having good friends who add positively to our well being and don't pull us down with their negativity.

Living in a house/flat with people that we genuinely feel comfortable with and a space that we feel truly at home in.

Eating well and exercising as much as we would like to.

Stop and think where you are with each of the above and where you would like to be in the future when you 'are happy'.

No matter where you live, or where you are from.

See where you now, and where you would ideally like to be in a year from now.

And then start working at making it happen.


Clearly I have been my reading my Yoga homework about The Search for Happiness and other such things. But also I have been thinking a lot about what my friend Sim said when I saw her last weekend and commented on how fantastic she looked, she said that she feels happier, since she decided to live as happily as she could here, now.
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